An unlikely conversion...

Growing up, I thought baseball was the most boring sport in the world. It took forever, nothing exciting happened, and when it did, I didn’t particularly care because I didn’t have a “favorite team” in the first place. It was basically a sport that was on when basketball wasn’t (which is probably one more reason I didn’t particularly care for it).

I still played it growing up, but enjoyed it about as much as I enjoyed pre-season conditioning in high school basketball. For the record, I did not enjoy pre-season conditioning in high school basketball. But I did it anyway. Needless to say, not having a team to support and not enjoying the actual playing of the sport left me quite jaded about baseball.

Also, I sucked at the Nintendo 64 Ken Griffey Jr.’s Major League Baseball in junior high (watch the intro, then skip to about 4:20 to see the gameplay and you'll understand), and that’s like…the best baseball game of all time. So that was always a degrading procedure when I’d have to play that game with my friends and lose 14-1.

After living that many years not liking baseball, you’d think I would have hated it by the time I was in college.

Well…I did. And, worse, I was in a region where everybody within 450 miles worshipped the same team. Always having been a guy who supported teams that nobody in the area liked (Arizona Wildcat college basketball ((and AZ Wildcat Softball)) and the Chicago Bears while living in Texas), it was mind-numbingly painful to see these Minnesota Twins-obsessed fans who were all infatuated with both a team and, more specifically, a sport that I truly couldn’t stand.

Those weird Twins fans understood (and loved) stuff like this...

Befriending the obsessed...
Well, turns out I ended up rooming with possibly the most Minnesota sports-loving person in the entire region (yeah…it’s like something out of a cheesy sitcom). I mean, my roommate could tell you the hometowns and high school baseball stats of guys who are on the Twins minor league teams. He knows the high school and college football stats for probably 90% of the Minnesota Vikings. He lives and dies with every Minnesota Golden Gopher touchdown, wrestling pin-fall, and hockey goal.

Although I clicked with him better than probably anyone on the campus of Augustana College, we were exact opposites when it came to sports.

But…after a full year of listening to him tell me about Minnesota Twins trades, players sent down to and brought up from the minor leagues, and season-ending injuries that would devastate the team, I realized that I knew the entire Twins roster without seeing a single game. I was also fascinated by the fact that there were individual players in Major League Baseball who, for one season, were paid almost half as much as the Twins ENTIRE roster's total payroll. And the Twins were still somehow playoff contenders.

So, I figured I should give them a chance.

The conversion...
It just so happened that I began to disprove my entire life’s schema about baseball. It might have been the fact that my roommate, who I genuinely enjoyed being around, watched games every night in our room and it was easier to just sit and watch them than it was to leave. It might have been the fact that all of my friends would sit around and have beers while watching the Twins play (and usually play some drinking game based on hits, strikeouts, runs, etc.), and I certainly wasn’t going to be left out of that. Or it might have just been the fact that I was tired of fighting a losing battle against Minnesota sports team-obsessed fans (just kidding, I still hate the Vikings).

Whatever it was, my roommate’s passion had rubbed off on me. I was a Twins fan. I’ll say it again: I was a Twins fan. Then, in the 2006 season (my junior year), the Twins ended up winning the A.L. Central Division and the excitement around that process basically cemented the fact that, from now on, I would be responding with “Twins, baby!” when asked which baseball team was my favorite.

There I am at the Metrodome, actually being a Twins fan...

Can he do that?...
Now, I justify my Twins fandom as not being a bandwagon jump (one of the most loathsome acts one can commit in the sports universe...I think the last sentence of that link's story sums it up nicely) due to the logic that I was never a baseball fan to begin with and, therefore, did not abandon a team I had once supported for a winning, locally-popular team. I simply began to truly appreciate the Twins and what they accomplish in Major League Baseball, as well as the efforts the organization puts into its regional fan bases to keep the connection with fans strong not only in the heart of Minneapolis-St. Paul, but also out in rural communities three, four, and up to six or seven hours away. It’s a group of hard-working athletes who do everything they can to win. It’s just about impossible not to respect them. And, consequently, it makes their success all the more enjoyable.

Unfortunately, the Twins lost tonight to the Chicago White Sox (a club I’ve grown to dislike) in a playoff tie-breaker game that would have made them Division Champions and thus would have gotten them into the American League playoffs. In a gut-wrenching, 1-0 loss, hundreds of thousands (and possibly millions) of fans had their hearts broken by an always-lethal Jim Thome home run that put Chicago ahead for the win.


So...now what happens?
Three years ago, I wouldn’t have cared (and probably would have laughed at the “whining” Twins fans who took their baseball just a little too seriously). Tonight, it just sucked. Straight up. Now, there is no doubt in my mind that there are Twins fans who are much, much more upset than me right now (it’s safe to say my former roommate is one of them). The problem is that, now, I empathize with those fans and I’m quite frustrated that I won’t be watching the Twins and supporting them in the playoffs, enjoying beers with my friends while the Twins tried to win the pennant, and celebrating the joy that can only come from that fiery passion that a sport ignites in the hearts of competitors around the world.

Instead…I’ll have to sit around waiting for basketball season to start. And for one of the rare times in my entire life, that does not appeal to me anywhere near as much as the thought of watching Justin Morneau hit a walk-off game-winner or watching Joe Nathan seal the win in the bottom of the ninth with a low fastball. It’s a weird feeling, but thanks to my friends, this region, and the Minnesota Twins, it’s one that I hope lasts for a long, long time.

But man…do I hate Jim Thome right now…

Have you had a similar experience? Let me know which team won you over (or lost your love) over the years. Which teams would you cry for in a championship loss or celebrate with ecstatic joy for in a championship victory? Do you even like sports? If not, which video game, computer operating system, or awesome book series won you over? Leave a comment and let me know so I can look into any and all of them. Maybe I'll be converted to those too...

Please help me with this...

Somebody please explain this to me:

I acquired the above image from this site, which has listed multiple pictures of bad parking jobs (the specific blog post title being "Parking a Car Too Difficult For You?"), but I find it hard to believe that this was any legitimate attempt whatsoever by a human being to actually park a car. It looks like it was on the WCPO-Channel 9 News, so I feel like it is probably legitimate.

I would love any and all comments that might give some insight as to how this occurred. I posted a similar post a few months ago, but that was more for comedic effect. This one...I just need some explanation.

I promise you, I will not mock ANY response you post in reply to this. I will only mock the person who "parked" this vehicle. So...if you are the person who "parked" this vehicle...then I probably will make fun of your comment. Or maybe just you. Sorry.

Comic books are NOT just for kids...part 2

This blog post is (also) for all the idiots in the world who think comic books (and other fantasy stories) are only for kids.

Ok, that may have (still) been harsh, but I needed to get your attention (again) without you immediately discarding the blog post.

First of all, read this post. Then read the one below.

This post will focus on the merits of reading literature that many may deem “childish” or immature. I can assure you that this is a somewhat ignorant outlook to take regarding the issue. Fortunately, brilliant philosophical and intellectual minds like the one belonging to C.S. Lewis are here to support me in my quest to prove that comic books aren’t “just for kids.”

Here’s Mr. Lewis with this quote on fiction:

“It is usual to speak in a playfully apologetic tone about one’s adult enjoyment of what are called ‘children’s books.’ I think the convention a silly one. No book is really worth reading at the age of ten which is not equally (and often far more) worth reading at the age of fifty – except, of course, books of information. The only imaginative works we ought to grow out of are those which it would have been better not to have read at all. A mature palate will probably not much care for crème de menthe; but it ought to still enjoy bread and butter and honey.”

-C.S. Lewis, from the essay On Stories

Comic books = ...dessert?
Now, I’m not going to sit here and analyze each line in the quote. I think if you take time to read through it more than once, it should make sense. But I am going to look at, and elaborate on, the last line of that quotation.

See, I look at that quote in a more specific way. This is my (or possibly Lewis’s in another essay or book that I can’t remember) interpretation:

When you are young (childhood age), you enjoy some form of desert (fill in cake, ice cream, brownies, etc…for simplicity’s sake, I’m going to stick with ice cream). As a kid, you enjoy ice cream whenever you can get your hands on it. At that same age, you may not at all enjoy meatloaf (substitute a meal you did not particularly care for in your youth). However, as you grew into adulthood, you may have, over time, acquired a taste for and enjoyment of meatloaf. This, however, DOES NOT mean that, in your maturing process, you lost your love for ice cream. In fact, it is quite likely that you will not only enjoy a meatloaf dinner, but you will also still savor the delicious sweetness of an ice cream cone or an ice cream sundae. While you’ve added to your palette, you haven’t necessarily “changed” your pallet.

This, to me, describes my passion for comic books. I have always enjoyed them. Since my youthful innocence when I would beg my mom to buy me Spider-Man comics in the grocery store as a kid, to buying them for $2.99 and $3.99 each every Wednesday at the comic book store, comic books have been an intellectual and mind-freeing medium of fiction that has consistently satiated my love for visual effects combined with fantasy storylines (and the “man I wish I could do that” factor in my life).

You may still enjoy THIS as a "grown-up"...

...the same way I still enjoy THIS as a "grown-up"...

The difference is, now (as an adult) I am able to enjoy so many more forms of fiction than I could in my younger years. I can read a 448-page historical fiction war novel, and be as captivated by the exploits of Alcibiades in Ancient Greece as I am with the Silver Surfer’s command of the Power Cosmic throughout the galaxies. I can be as blown away by the conclusion of 1984 and Of Mice and Men as I can by the deeply moving self-sacrifice made by Colossus in order to prevent the mutant race from being exterminated by a deadly virus.

Can you enjoy both?

To me, the comic book is simply one more medium that has remained on my palette as a form of intellectual stimulation. I refuse to “replace” it with a more “substantive” medium of fiction because I don’t feel it is necessary to do so. Can I read Great Expectations and decipher the themes and motifs within such a literary masterpiece? Yes, I feel that I am quite capable of doing so. Can I read Alan Moore’s Watchmen and find intense gravity and depth in Rorschach’s absolutist outlook on life or Ozymandias’s consequentialist attitude? Yes. Those themes (and more) are present in a work such as Watchmen. They are simply packaged in a visually-stunning comic book series/graphic novel. That, however, does not take away from the content of each page and each dialogue bubble.

So, my overall point is this: comic books, when given the chance they deserve, contain plenty of wisdom and profundity as long as they are well-written. Comics may be unrealistic fiction, but that doesn’t take away from the overall purpose of the writer’s efforts as a serious author. If a space novel or fantasy tale can be considered literature (and many of them are), then I find it hard to believe that comic books don’t deserve the same. Whether or not one thinks they are strictly for kids, the truth of the matter is that even if a “kid” can enjoy a comic book, there is often plenty of substance for a 22-year-old (or 42-year-old for that matter) to absorb and later reflect upon.

Unless you believe that name-calling and pretentiousness are the only ways to handle someone else’s passion for a literary format you have yet to examine. In which case, keep making fun of the people who read comic books.

P.S. - I understand that one argument against my C.S. Lewis quote may be “What if I never liked ice cream (fantasy stories) in the first place?” and I agree that, in such a case, comic books are probably not a fictional medium of choice for you. I can respect that. My point is that I should not have to defend my enjoyment of comic books due to the notion that they “are for kids.”

I’m also very much open to any discussion you may deem relevant in the “Comments” section of this post (or the previous one) regarding this subject. In fact, I encourage you to participate if you have any interest whatsoever. I’d love to hear some other sides/elements of this argument if you have any to offer.

I won’t be as rude as I was in the opening line. I promise.

"Spider-Man, Spider-Man...does whatever a spider can..."

Why comic books are NOT just for kids...

This blog post is also for all the idiots in the world who think comic books are for kids.

Ok, that may have been harsh, but I needed to get your attention without you immediately discarding this post. You see, I’ve recently been engaging more than ever in a debate regarding the merits and quality of comic books as fiction. I finally decided it was time to explain to the world why I justify comic books as literature and how, unbeknownst to many, comic books can be completely centered on themes more adult-oriented and in-depth than your average best-selling novel.

Here’s a little backstory as to where this post is coming from. Basically, these are the types of comments I’ve heard all my life regarding my passion for comic books and graphic novels (as a now-22 year old):

-“Yeah…yeah comic books were cool…when I was SEVEN!”
-“Hey when you’re done reading your comics, come over and we’ll play POGS!”
-“I’m ignorant and think I know everything about everything and you’re a moron for liking things that may be enjoyed by someone who isn’t a grown and ignorant adult like me!”

Yes, I know, the last one is an example of what runs through my head after I hear the first two. But you get the picture. The point is that people don’t always have an intellectual respect for comics, and I think two major elements exist to make said lack of respect a reality.

The first of these major elements is that some people don’t understand the content and substance of today’s comic literature. These individuals have no clue as to the intellectual depth and gravity of a well-written series of comic book. The extent of their comic book awareness is the “BAM!...POW!” 60s Batman show, the original “X-Men” animated series, and the Spider-Man movies. Sadly, only one of those three things listed does any kind of justice to its comic book counterpart. Good work X-Men.

The second element is going to be covered in part 2 of this blog post, which will be posted very, very soon (UPDATE: It has now been posted here...but finish reading this one first). It considers the frivolous notion that enjoying comic books isn’t appropriate for an individual over the age of seven and incorporates sage wisdom from an unlikely source to refute this idea of what is or is not appropriate for a 22-year-old.

But we’re going to focus on the content of comics right now. All of the stuff that the casual/non-comic book fan doesn’t ever see because he or she would “never be a big enough baby to pick up a comic book and read it.”

Point blank: If you are one of those people, you are ignorant and you are missing out on something quite enjoyable as a result of your ignorance.

A literary (comic book) masterpiece…

The inspiration behind this post was a discussion regarding the literary achievements of and accolades received by Alan Moore’s Watchmen. Here you have a novel that is the only graphic novel (comic book collection) on Time Magazine’s "100 best English-language novels from 1923 to the present" (long title, I know) and the only graphic novel to win a Hugo Award. These aren’t comic book awards. These are awards and distinctions that truly separate the graphic novel from Archie Comics and Sunday funnies as a literary work of fiction.

The themes of Watchmen are intense. The graphic novel covers quite a few of the issues we face (or faced) as humans in the world, ranging from an entire underlying theme of the nation’s distrust and fear as a result of the Cold War to death, murder, justice (legal and vigilante), rape, love, governmental conspiracy, heroism, and the value of human life. And that’s in a 12-issue comic series.

Watchmen isn’t a story about a bunch guys in capes conquering “evil-doers” with one-punch knockouts or masked men catching bank robbers and saving the day. While it has a few similar elements, Watchmen is written in a style that, if one were to replace the comic book illustration with explanatory dialogue, would be considered a captivating work of literary fiction. Let’s be honest, it didn’t make Time’s previously-noted “100 best English-language novels from 1923 to the present” list because of the pictures (which is not to say that Dave Gibbons’ artwork doesn’t bring the graphic novel into the pantheon of great comic book masterpieces, because it surely does).

If you feel like comic books aren’t for adults, please give Watchmen a valid reading attempt. I promise: if you are even remotely intelligent, it will change your stance on the issue.

Even so, I can’t rely on this one graphic novel to prove my point. Which is why I’ll take a much more current cultural phenomenon and let it speak for me.

The Dark Knight’s darkness in comic form…

The Dark Knight is already widely considered to be the best superhero movie ever made. Many attribute much of this success to Heath Ledger’s chilling portrayal of a conscious-absent Joker that deviates mightily from the clown-like prankster featured in the 60s television series and the original Batman film (skip to the commercial at 1:12).

But, I ask you this: do you have any idea where the inspiration behind Heath Ledger’s Joker came from? The motivation behind Heath Ledger’s Joker came from COMIC BOOKS. That’s right – the terrifyingly careless man who values human life less than he values his mouth-shredding pocket knife is based on the comic books that portray the Joker as a psychopath who fears nothing.

We’re talking about a Joker that (most non-comic book fans would be appalled to know) beat the second Robin to death right in front of his mother’s eyes…and then BLEW THEM BOTH UP! Here, see the vicious assault for yourself:



And then...




Yeah. Joker beats him down and lets him die. Because, in the comics (before The Dark Knight was even a in its beginning stages), the Joker was that brutal.

Fortunately (and unrealistically), Jason Todd turned up alive years later. Only to be doing things like this (this one is rather graphic, be warned):



Still think comics are simply for little kids?

The Point?

I didn’t write this post to show you some grisly comic book pictures. I wrote it to explain that comic books aren’t just for kids. It’s not only sticky-fingered 7-year-olds that can and should enjoy comic books and graphic novels. I'm in no way saying it's the violence that makes them good, I'm just showing that they aren't as fun-natured, bubbly, and cartoony as some might think.

Comic books employ as many deeply-themed fictional storylines as full-length works of fiction. While the art and pictures in comics help to tell the tale in the place of flowery description, the content and message of the comic’s themes are often much deeper than the stereotypical thoughts people have of them.

Do bad, corny, and otherwise awful comics exist in the world? Of course – just like cheesy romance novels and stupidly gruesome monster murder stories exist for cheap thrills and enjoyment. But that doesn’t mean that, just like any other work of fictional literature, comics can’t provide a well-written, engrossing, and captivating storyline to those who are open-minded enough to invest the time and effort into a comic book.

So, before you make some snide comment to a friend who buys comic books weekly or a coworker who is aggravated by the newest superhero movie’s deviation from its epic 1997 comic storyline, give that person the benefit of the doubt. Keep in mind that maybe, just maybe, the friend or co-worker is currently reading a work of fiction in comic book form that has more substance to it than the current novel you are trudging through each night.

Or maybe he or she is just some adult that needs to grow up and stop acting like a kid.

I’ll be more than happy to continue this discussion in the comments section as well. It’s already far too long a post, but it’s something about which I am passionate and I didn’t want to emaciate the content or message behind it. I said I’d start writing shorter posts, and I feel like I was doing a decent job until this one, so bear with me.


“I been browsin’, inspectin’, X-Men comics, you know I collect ‘em…”

Too long a break...

I apologize. I've been spreading myself too thin and, consequently, have been lacking in the blog post department. Unfortunately, this absence is detrimental to me seeing as my writing will hopefully serve as one of the many facets I hope to present a potential employer regarding my future avenues of income and life happiness.

So, here is the plan. I'm going to go and clear my head this weekend. I'm taking a rare vacation and will be visiting a dear, close friend of mine named Dave Matthews. Dave has this "band" of "musicians" and they manage to play music that makes me question whether Heaven consists of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates or just some grungy guy taking tickets for an eternal DMB concert. I would be so happy if it were the latter.

So once I've left surreality and have grudgingly returned to this world known as "reality," I will be getting back to work both in the professional sense and in the personal sense. If you are going to be at Alpine Valley this weekend and want to say hello, send me an e-mail and we can get in touch. If you aren't going to be at Alpine Valley this Saturday and Sunday, I would highly recommend that you do everything that is remotely within the realm of possibility to try and get out there.

I mean...how often do you get to enjoy Heaven on earth?

I know I tend to end my posts with song lyrics, but I thought I'd instead give you a few samples of the happiness that will be bestowed upon me in 43.5 hours...

The first of these clips is what I consider to be my favorite live version of any DMB song. While Warehouse isn't necessarily my favorite song overall, nothing tops this Central Park performance in my book...



The poetically beautiful insanity of the next video is one of the many reasons my legs feel like I've run a marathon the day after a DMB concert...dancing in place (on a hill) can be so tiring...



Finally, a rendition of my all-time favorite DMB song...not necessarily this specific version, (although this is a darn good one). God I love Two Step...

This made me laugh out loud today...

This is a very short post. In fact, it's just one picture. But it made me laugh out loud multiple times throughout the morning.

Whether it's been photoshopped has now come into question at this point, but the truth is, I don't really care. I'm just going to assume it's not and continue to laugh at it every time I see it...

What makes a great "literary" work?

As a preface, this was originally intended to be a quick Tumblr post rather than a full-fledged blog post. But I like to write, so it turned into both. Consequently, this post doesn't contain my usual number of random links and videos, but since it's a slightly more serious subject than my usual posts, I think that'll be ok. Anyway, sorry for the boring intro.

I’ve recently engaged in a conversation/discussion regarding whether or not comic books and Harry Potter can be classified as legitimate “literature.” Well, not necessarily that they aren’t literature, but that they are on similar levels of what qualifies as actual literature.

This catalyst of this discussion was my excitement over the recent release of the trailer for the Hugo Award-winning graphic novel “Watchmen.” I explained, via Twitter, that “Watchmen” is an unbelievably deep and well-written work that is without a doubt more on the level of a literary novel than a comic book. In fact, it’s the only graphic novel (which is basically a comic book novel if you aren’t aware) to make Time Magazine’s “100 best English-language novels from 1923 to the present.”

From there, the Harry Potter series was brought into the discussion as being compared to “Watchmen” in terms of literary level. This brought me to my first question, which is “What qualifies something as ‘literature’ in today’s day and age?” Unfortunately, due to time and space constraints, I’ll focus on the Harry Potter side of the discussion. The comic books as literature argument will come on a day when I have more time to concentrate on my words. I’m very defensive about my comic books, you see.

Moving along. In my opinion, Rowling’s ability to write a literary work that appeals to people ranged from age 6 to age 56 shows that she has indeed crafted what could be considered one of the “great pieces of writing ever written" (the quote from the other side of the discussion being that she had not created one of the "great pieces of writing ever written").

One reason I consider it to be so is that, while it may be written toward a younger audience, people of all ages have no problem enjoying the novels. Obviously it’s no “Pride and Prejudice” or “Great Expectations,” but at the same time, those novels are more or less unreadable for anyone under the age of 17 or 18 (even then, readers at that age will unlikely understand the depth and themes of the works). On the other hand, readers of almost any age can find very deep and important issues underlying the wizardry, spells, and flying broomsticks. Harry Potter covers themes ranging from the basic battle of Good vs. Evil to racism, discrimination, class-distinction, and accepting death as an inevitable part of life.

Specifically, the argument was presented that the Harry Potter series is one that, in 20-30 years, will not be something that appeals to adults due to its adolescent themes. My response to this: The Lord of the Rings is a series that has captivated readers of all ages since 1954. And while the films clearly gave it a major revival in 2001, it had certainly managed to stand the test of time even before the films were released.

My question is, between the Lord of the Rings and The Chronicles of Narnia (which were released around the same time) and the release of the Harry Potter series, which literary works have had that kind of influence and inspired (in people of all ages) a desire to pick up an old-fashioned book and spend weeks, days, or (in my case) hours reading it?

Also, the argument was presented that people in 20-30 years will have little interest in reading the Harry Potter novels. I would say, as a 22-year-old reader who very much enjoys fantasy and science-fiction (as well as non-sci-fi literary “classics” like “1984,” “Lord of the Flies,” and “Of Mice and Men”), that I did not read any Harry Potter books until I was 20 years old and I immediately read the Lord of the Rings trilogy for the first time following my completion of “The Half-Blood Prince.” Now, under the premise of people "not wanting to read something like that 20-30 years later," (paraphrased) I might be considered an anomaly. And I’m very ready to concede that it was also a result of the exciting Lord of the Rings movies (which, I will again concede, in Harry Potter’s case, will be quite dated in 20-30 years), but that doesn’t mean I didn’t thoroughly enjoy reading the Lord of the Rings trilogy 20-30 years after it was written and published.

Similarly, some people are absolutely obsessed (not necessarily in a good way) with the Harry Potter series. I find it hard to believe that these same people, in the next 10-15 years, won’t be sharing their passion with their own children. I know, from personal experience with my mother, that parents will be inclined to share things with their children in the hopes that said children will enjoy those things as well. The reason I love reading as much as I do is because my mom read “Where the Red Fern Grows” to me as a six-year-old. I cried at the end, and I realized how moving a made-up story written on paper could be. Then she told me that, when she was my age, she had the same reaction to the novel.

Regardless, I think Harry Potter will have a hold on society for a long time because, as opposed to other works written for children and teenagers, Harry Potter was written for everyone, kids and adults alike. To me, that’s what lifts it from a level of an elementary-level work of fiction to a truly great work of literature. New trends will certainly appear over time, but, much like the Lord of the Rings and The Chronicles of Narnia have failed to fall into the abyss of societal neglect, I feel Harry Potter will manage to survive and thrive as the series’ adoring fans continue to love the novels and pass them down to generation after generation.

This coming from someone who didn’t read his first page of a Harry Potter book until he was 20-years-old. Of course, that may be the reason I see it as a literary work rather than a children’s book.